Potholes Begin Fattening for Winter

CHICAGO — With seasons changing and winter on the way, Chicago’s plants and animals are starting to prepare for the coming cold. Trees have begun to shed their leaves, rats have begun to gather and store squirrels for winter food sources, and the city’s many potholes have begun to fatten.

“To survive the winter, potholes usually need to widen by a minimum of two to three inches,” said Salvatore Green, 56, an operations coordinator with Chicago Department of Transportation, “Increasing their size through summer traffic so they might live long enough to expand and deepen during snow plowing season is how a small dip in the road grows into a real axel breaker. Nature truly is magnificent.”

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CDOT has been monitoring the progress of this year’s pothole expansion, and say that the once endangered road hazard is now flourishing since the city both can’t and won’t make any repairs. CDOT officials encourage citizens to report potholes so they may be measured, studied, and given a cute nickname.

“I never thought I’d see the streets full of wild potholes again,” said Green, “but now in my lifetime we’re seeing road conditions that haven’t been worse since the city had wooden roads. My grandkids are going to get to experience the spinal injuries and vehicle damage of a simpler time. It’s beautiful to see nature healing.”

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