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Starbucks Roastery Offers Union Members Free Tour of Giant Coffee Vats Someone Might Fall Into, God Forbid

Once inside, multiple workers pointed out what appeared to be human skulls bobbing at the surface of the industrial-sized vats of joe, but Wilder assured the special guests that they were merely “coffee bones.”

Starbucks Now Offering No Touch Nitro Coffee Spray

“Of course much of our product inspiration comes from nature,” said Starbucks lead product designer Cesar Van de Camp, 45 “And in this case I was deeply influenced by how they hose down elephants at the zoo.”