LINCOLN PARK — Big news for fans of big cats! Lincoln Park Zoo has announced the birth of three lion cubs to their lioness, Zari. Officials at the zoo report that mom is doing well, and that one of the cubs can only tell lies, one can only tell the truth, and one is just a regular lion cub.
“We were thrilled that Zari gave birth to three healthy babies,” said Paul Morre, 53, a big cat specialist at Lincoln Park Zoo, “it was a surprise that two immediately spoke to us in deep, resonant human voices and informed us that one can only lie and one can only tell the truth and to proceed we’d need to determine which is which, but the other one seems to just be a normal lion cub, which is a relief.”
The cubs, yet to be seen by the public, are reportedly up and walking around and their eyes have opened and are occasionally glowing. They’ve been spotted nursing and offering clues to anyone who will listen about a treasure—or trap—nearby.
“They’re so cute!” said Margaret Willing, 42, an administrative assistant at the zoo who got to visit the babies in their enclosure. “They have the most adorable little faces. One told me my husband didn’t love me, so I’m pretty sure that’s the one that only lies. Gosh, I hope it’s the one that only tells lies. Certainly wasn’t the normal one.”
It’ll be weeks before the triplets are ready for their zoo debut, and in the meantime the zoo is hoping they grow and stop telling people which door in their enclosure is the way out, and which door leads to a gruesome demise.
“We definitely have our hands full! We’re just happy one is a regular lion,” said Morre. “At least we think it is. There’s a chance it’s also going to do something spooky and mysterious. It could just be waiting to reveal whatever its bit is when the time is right.”