"There’s a delicate coordination to still seem proud of your friends for following their dreams, and never having to give suggestions from uncomfortable chairs in dusty performance spaces."

“We’ve got a little computer der that shows when someone ahead has one of the apps open so we just wait until you break down and click ‘order ride’ before we gun it into view.”

Bridgeport — In an alley near the intersection of S Halsted and W 35th street, several residents reported over the weekend that they saw a sizable assortment of rats putting together some sort of m

“And when they handed me a mug of damp spices, I knew I’d beaten the crowd!”

She couldn’t comment on the toilet aspect, except to say that that’s where they ended up, “almost as if they belonged there.”

“Most nights we got pizza delivered from Lou Malnati’s. Once I got him to walk down Magnificent Mile with me after promising to hold his hand.” 

“We used to discuss how the cat was doing and what she’s planting her garden” said Lauren Green, 35, whose mother lives in Lake County. “Now she’s trying to convince me to sell my car because we’re ‘sitting ducks’ in it”

“I watch local news every night, so I’m always scared,” said Jessica Montague, 28, a mother of two kids, 5 and 3, “the idea that some sicko could poison my babies with fentanyl or worse, trick them into eating ketchup, is just so disgusting. What’s wrong with people?

Once a popular attraction in the heyday of Bulls basketball (pre-Derrick Rose injuries), Michael Jordan’s Steak House has unfortunately lost touch with many of the Chicagoans who often categorized their dining experience there as “fine” and “sports-themed.”

CHICAGO — With grocery giant Kroger exploring purchasing its competitor, Albertsons, it seems likely that Kroger-owned Mariano’s will soon own Jewel-Osco.