spring

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“Spring Has Sprung,” Muses Man as He Smells a Street Filled With a Month’s Worth of Thawed Dog Shit

“God, it’s beautiful out,” continued Portsmith, stepping over some waterlogged trash that had been trampled into the snow and was no longer recognizable as a takeout container from a local pizza place. 

Spring Snow Reminder That Nothing Matters, Also Money Is Fake, Heaven and Hell Here on Earth

“When I wake up and look outside and see it’s snowing in late April, I feel like God is playing a sick joke on me,” said Gwen Esteves, 26, “but then I’m reminded that God was a lie invented to keep us from panicking about our own mortality. Personally, I no longer fear death. If it’s snows one more time I’m going to go outside and let it claim me.”

“I Heard It’s Going to be an Early Spring,” Predicts Asshole Who Knows Nothing

“I Heard It’s Going to be an Early Spring,” Predicts Asshole Who Knows Nothing